BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT ! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE! NO CAPITALISTS ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT! BEWARE!

GANG OF JUVENILES HIJACK WAYWARD SPACECRAFT: RUINS GLOBAL ECONOMY

What does this mean for the future of mankind?


Year by year, people of earth (or what's left of it, really) have begun migrating to the foreign space rock we know as "Mars." Why, you may ask? Well, seems like we've begun overstaying our welcome here in Mother Nature's warm embrace. Try as we may, regret is overdue, and no amount of kowtowing will return us back to what once was.

As luck would have it, the gang known as "The Skibidis" have hijacked a wayward rocket vehicle, filled its fuel tank with bubble water, powered it with the sheer density and weight of their audacities, and launched it into space. Scientists had hoped for their early death, and were dismayed by their survival.

Due to this act of rebellion, communities around the world are scrambling for order. Not sure how the economy ties to this exactly, so just wait for someone more competent than me to report on that tomorrow.

ITS A STAR BRO

SO? TIRED OF ALL THIS BULLSHIT?

[click on the text to open or close]

I get it. All this bawkwobble over climate change, political unrest, gangs of hormonal teenagers, planet decay, imminent death, and whatnot. It gets to you doesn't it? Well look no further for a solution (or escape). We, the AdvocatesofDeath, are organizing a party (mass suicide). Together, we shall free ourselves of this farce!

[Accomplishment of the application form below is a requirement in order to partake in the AdvocatesofDeath summer bash of 2125.]

[dont actually input anything, i havent learned how to make that shit work yet]

What is thine Elon Musk Brain Chip™ number?

What is your date of birth? Just so we know how many years you lasted in the world of the sane before you ultimately decided to join a ragtag of suicidal extremists.

At what time do you feel the happiest? Answer for sugoi purposes.

What is thine favorite color? So we know what color of bullet you want to be killed by.

The AdvocatesofDeath would like to see your silly little face. (There is a possibility of your visage getting stolen by chinese data scalping companies, which will then be sold to factories to be used as a template for wartime robots of Suffering&Decay™). Upload at your own risk.

ITS A STAR BRO

AdvocatesofDeath's TOP 5 RELIABLE WAYS TO RID ONESELF OFF THIS MORTAL PLANE

  1. Gun to head
  2. Good ol' rope action
  3. Skewer launched from 45 feet away, straight into the liver
  4. Car crash (in front of preschool)
  5. Backflip off the top of a hospital

AdvocatesofDeath's "THE FINAL MEAL BEFORE A VIOLENT EXECUTION" RECOMMENDATIONS

  • Ribs with fried potatoes
  • Grilled pork belly with ensaladang talong
  • Baked porkchop rice (authentic hong kong style)
  • Desecrated carcass of your worst enemy
  • Salted egg chicken with rice (authentic singaporean style)
  • Carbonara
ITS A STAR BRO

INTERESTED ABOUT THE GREAT LEADER OF THE AdvocatesofDeath?

[click on the text to open or close]

Greetings, PUSSY BABY SHITTER LICKER, it is I, ẗ̷̨̰́h̴̝͙͛ẻ̸̱ǧ̸͔̕ṟ̵̈e̸̞̽͌ã̵͇̐ẗ̸̖́̋o̷̭͆͝v̸̗͛̎e̸̬̾͘r̷̛͓̬̄l̴͍͊̓o̶̪͗̽r̷̥͊͆d̵̡̞̿, ruler of the polluted seas, supervisor of 34 shenzhen (hasn't really been called shenzhen since the 5th world war if we're being honest) factories, separator of healthy families, and proud owner of the Intergalactic Spacehub for Freaks and Outcasts (aka the AdvocatesofDeath).

Here are some silly facts about me:

[click on the text to open or close]
  • likes amputated legs
  • consumer of all things edible (everything is, if you're brave enough)
  • loves anime and other losernerd forms of literature and storytelling
  • type 2 illiterate
  • violently discriminates against robotic minorities (looking at yall fucking CLANKERS) (really ironic considering the fact that said individual leads a community for minorities) (race on race racism das wassup)

I implore you to connect with me platonically and viscerally on a deeper, not exactly shallow, level. Here is the link to the totally harmless site in which you can connect with me platonically and viscerally on a deeper, not exactly shallow, level.

Input thine name for an even deeper connection.

ITS A STAR BRO

KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM! KILL YOURSELF CUCK! CLICK ON THE STARS IF YOU HAVE A SELF-ESTEEM PROBLEM!